Emily Vogeltanz

Why is Good Friday called good? As a child, I remember feeling confused by Good Friday. To me the idea of Jesus being hurt and killed seemed anything but good. Even now as a mother to 4, I’ve seen the same question in the eyes of my children as we’ve discussed the events leading up to Easter.  For many families of small children, we can be tempted to gloss over the brutality of Passover week and simply celebrate with peeps, pastels, and baskets rather than talking about the historical fact and life-transforming truth of these important days.  You might wonder if talking about the cross will make them feel sad, overwhelmed, or even scared, but as we seek to raise our children to be Jesus followers, it’s important that we find the words to teach our children the whole story. Especially the story of  Good Friday and Easter as our faith hinges on these incredible true events in history. Here are a few ways to start a conversation in your home…  Begin with scripture. There is always power in the Word of God. Around the dinner table or in a moment that isn’t rushed, take a few minutes to slowly read Luke 22-23 together and give space for conversation and questions. Don’t worry if you can’t answer every question; this is a time for the whole family to grow. And if the kids have the wiggles and don’t seem like they’re catching it all, don’t fret or get frustrated.  Your obedience in opening the Word in your home is planting seeds in their hearts, and I promise they are catching more than you think.  Invite your kids to tell the story back to you in their own words and see what parts of the story captured their attention. Then, read the account of the crucifixion again from The Jesus Storybook Bible or another children’s bible that paraphrases scripture in language geared specifically towards kids.   As a parent, you know your own kids the best, so use simple age-appropriate words they can easily understand. While you don’t have to use graphic detail, our kids should understand the weight of what Jesus experienced on the cross on our behalf. It’s important to connect Jesus’ death on the cross to our sins.  Without understanding sin, we cannot fully grasp the significance of Jesus’ love and his sacrifice on the cross. Remind your kids that Jesus was perfect and never sinned yet, he chose to die a brutal death on the cross for our sins. As it is so beautifully written in the Jesus StoryBook Bible, God loved us so much that he gave his “Never Stopping, Never Giving Up, Unbreaking, Always and Forever Love” to Jesus.    Spoiler alert! We know how the story ends, so we call Good Friday, good. The hard, heavy, and beautiful truth is that Jesus died for our sins, but we don’t despair or lose hope because Jesus didn’t stay dead — he rose from the grave and defeated death once and for all. Jesus is alive! Help your kids see the whole story, both the ache of the cross and the joy of the empty tomb. Jesus’ act of love on the cross and rising from the dead means that we now can have life forever. This is the gospel, the Good News.   Jesus said “Let the little children come to me”, and He is still calling children to Himself. The work and revelation God does in our children’s hearts is not cute; it is holy.  In discipling our children, we must talk about the cross, sin, and hope of Jesus often in our home, don’t simply save it for Easter weekend. We are Easter people every day of the year. As a parent, I’ve experienced God using these conversations with my children to impact and sharpen my own faith. The more we talk about the things of God in our home, the more we all will grow in our relationship with Him.    Resources // Jesus Story Book bible –  Incredible resource for families that explains the thread of Jesus through scripture from Genesis to Revelation in a way that kids and parents can both understand and enjoy.   Bible Project – For older kids, teens (and parents!), the Bible Project offers incredible short and free videos that help visually explain scripture. Your kids will be captivated by the storytelling in these videos which will lead to great conversation. Luke 19-23 Video Sacrifice and Atonement

My kids have always loved church. There’s music, games, friends, and sometimes even snacks—what’s not to love!? But beyond the fun, how do we talk to our kids about the heart of church? Why do we go? What’s the point? Why is this part of our family’s weekly rhythm? These are great questions to discuss with your kids and maybe even wrestle with on your own as you shape your family culture.  Church is a family to which we belong. By grace, we are God’s children. That makes us family–brothers and sisters placed in a household called the Church. It’s not about membership or a club you join, it’s about a relationship with God and with each other. We often remind our kids that the Church isn’t perfect because it’s composed of imperfect people, but the Church is part of God’s good design. The early Christian church was formed by the followers of Jesus after his death, burial, and miraculous resurrection. We learn about the beginning of the Christian church in gospel writings, the book of Acts, and the New Testament letters. What started with humble beginnings 2,000 years ago has now reached around the globe and spans across ethnicities, borders, ages, and demographics. Some churches gather in steepled buildings, big box buildings, houses, and huts. But the Church is not just about what happens in the four walls where we gather, it’s far more about the way in which we scatter to carry the truth of Jesus to our friends and neighbors, putting His love on display through our lives. The Church is people. And together, we are united on a mission in our cities and to the world to share and reflect the love and beauty of Jesus.  Here are a few simple statements you can share with your kids to help explain the what and why of going to church: We gather to Worship  Worship is not just an individual experience but a communal act of expressing gratitude, reverence, and adoration for God. There is power in gathering with believers to raise a song of praise to Jesus. Our worship buoys our faith as we remember and honor God, standing shoulder to shoulder with others who are in agreement. We can sing loud or quiet, with arms raised or knees bowed. Our expression and practice of worship is welcomed and cultivated within our church communities.  We gather to Pray  Ephesians 4 reminds us that there is strength and power in numbers. Church is where we gather in corporate prayer, where believers can pray together for various needs and concerns. Church is the family we can run to when life is hard or when life is good. We need each other and we were created to care for, encourage and pray for one another.  We gather to Serve + Give We are the recipients of the greatest gift the world has ever known—the love, grace, and mercy of God. Having freely received, we freely give. We give of our time, talent, and treasure as we identify needs in our community. Our act of serving and giving is a form of our worship. It’s important to teach our children that they have a unique role to play in the body of Christ, and the Church is where we gather for maximum impact so that others can hear and learn about Jesus.  We gather to Remember As Jesus followers, we have been commanded to take communion and to be baptized as outward signs of our faith. Communion is done in community; believers take bread and wine as a symbol to remember what Jesus did for us on the cross. Baptism is a public profession of faith. Both communion and baptism are meant to be done corporately among a group of believers as we remember, celebrate, and honor King Jesus.  We gather to Grow  Church is where we can learn and uphold the Word of God. Through preaching, teaching, and studying the Bible together at Church, Jesus followers deepen their understanding of God’s heart and how the Truth is applied to our lives. Being part of a church community also provides accountability. It helps us stay grounded in our faith, shapes our value system, and provides tangible ways for us to support one another in times of struggle.  As a church community, we gather to grow, remember, serve, give, pray, and worship. Church is part of God’s good design to help us to endure and “run the race” of life well. (1 Corinthians 9)  We were made for community and it’s vital for our kids to experience what it’s like to prioritize gathering and serving as part of a church so that it becomes a healthy practice in their own life, growth, and journey with Jesus. So, don’t grow weary, moms and dads. Keep showing up to church. The seeds we sow into our kids will take roots deep into their hearts and help shape who they become.  (1 Corinthians 12:12, Acts 2, Matthew 28:19, Luke 22:19, 1 Corinthians 11:26, 1 John 5:2)

As parents, we have the unique privilege and great responsibility of helping shape the hearts of our children. Our ultimate role is not to ensure they are “good people” or enroll them in the greatest college or even make sure they get a good job one day. Our God-ordained assignment is to point them to Jesus. Therefore, our role as parents goes far beyond behavior modification. We are stewards of their hearts, shepherds ordained to tend to their souls. While the reality of that calling on our life can feel overwhelming at times, God has given us everything we need to walk with our children as we humbly seek him. (2 Peter 1:3)  Every conversation, carpool minute, bath time, nightly tuck-in, and every important or seemingly insignificant moment in between is actually an opportunity to speak truth and life over our children to help shape their theology of God and a right view of themselves. Each moment is a tiny building block helping lay a great foundation for life.  Among the most important foundations we are laying in our children is a Biblical view of their identity in Christ. Accomplishing this is not a one-time conversation or a task best outsourced to Sunday school. This path is paved by dozens of conversations and deposits of Truth teaching our children what God says is true about them. The world is clever about lying to our kids with sound-good mantras like, “You be you” and “Live your own truth.” But these empty phrases will only lead our kids to destruction and disappointment. Like us, our children need an anchor that will hold in both the highs and the hardships of life. Our kids need a deep understanding of who they are in Christ Jesus.  Here are some simple reminders about our unique and holy identity in Christ that we can weave into conversations with our kids this week:   “Remember kids, we are people of the Word, not the World” It’s important to help our kids rightly discern the difference between what the World is screaming versus what the Word is speaking. The World constantly bombards us with confusing messages that go against God’s heart and design. So, it’s essential to equip our kids with a solid understanding of who they are in God’s eyes, grounded in Scripture. The World is unsteady, but the Word of God is unchanging therefore we anchor our lives in what God says is true. This alone will best guide and define your child’s understanding of their identity. Our bible is the mirror where we learn who we truly are created to be and how to live.  Celebrate and uphold the Word of God in your family as the primary source of Truth.  (John 17:15, Psalm 119:89)  “Remember kids, you are SO loved”  Kids need to know they are loved by their parents, but ultimately they need to know they are loved by their Father in Heaven. Our human love is messy, but God’s love is perfect and is perfectly displayed in the gospel. It is in the Gospel we learn our value.  We were so loved that God gave us Jesus to rescue us from death. The gospel we celebrate is not that our sin made us bad people and Jesus makes us better. No, we believe our situation was far worse than that. Our sin left us spiritually dead and separated from the perfect Father. The good news is this: Jesus didn’t just come to make us better versions of ourselves. Jesus came to bring us from death to life. So no matter what the world throws at us, no matter what mistake we make or lie the enemy tries to convince us to believe, we are eternally loved, treasured, and safe in Christ Jesus. That good news defines both who and whose we are forever.  Celebrate the gift of Jesus in your child’s life and remind them they are covered always and forever by His perfect love.  (Romans 5:8, John 1:12, John 3:16)  “Remember kids, you belong to Jesus and reflect His light to the World.”  Because Christ gave His life for ours, we are now part of the family of God. So, Jesus is everything to us. He is number one in our hearts and central to all we do. Our identity? We are Jesus people and we are appointed to carry His light to the World. This reality shapes how we live. As Jesus people, we rise above feelings, choose joy, and live from a source greater than ourselves. This is the radiance that sets us apart and draws others towards Christ in us. We are Light carriers.  Celebrate the ways your child reflects the light of Christ to the world.  (Matthew 5:14-16, Romans 14:8, John 1:9)  “Remember kids, God has uniquely designed and created you for a purpose.”  When our kids encounter doubts about their worth or abilities, we must help them recall that God Himself fearfully and wonderfully made them. And God does not make mistakes. Male and female, God perfectly knit us together in our mother’s womb. We are not accidental or incidental. We are uniquely crafted by the hand of God and He has laid out plans and purposes for our lives. There are good works and specific tasks He has created us to fulfill. This reality and sense of purpose greater than ourselves is what inspires us to live boldly and embrace the unique qualities and gifts in our lives for the Glory of God. We can rest knowing that God is in control.  As the Westminster Catechism so eloquently reminds us, “The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy him forever.”¹ This is the ultimate goal as we live out His plans and purposes in our lives.  Celebrate, call out, and speak blessing over your children’s talents, spiritual gifting, and being as they learn to live for the glory of God.  (Ephesians 2:10, Psalm 139, Romans 11:36, Psalm 86:9, Isaiah 60:21, 1 Corinthians 10:31)  “Remember kids, God has spoken promises over your life.”  Our kids need to understand that  God didn’t just save them to leave them. They aren’t living this journey with Jesus alone. As a good Father, He has equipped them with everything they need and has spoken promise over their lives.  As God’s children, we are now royalty, sons and daughters, of the King above all kings. This is the reality of who we are. (Hello, princess/prince!) You are not your mistakes or failures or even your successes, but by God’s grace and good design, we are His children. As part of the family of God, there are promises we have to look forward to and anchor our lives. There is an inheritance in heaven for us, the power of the Holy Spirit, and the promise of His presence. God also promises to strengthen us, give us rest, answer our prayers, and more. Each of these promises is evidence of our identity in Christ. It doesn’t mean life will always be easy (because it won’t) but we can cling to the fact that we will be okay no matter what because God is with us. Even in the face of difficulty, disease, disappointment, or death, God is with us through it all. Life is sometimes hard, but God is always good.  Celebrate and remind your child of the good gifts and promises of God in their life.  (Ephesians 3:14-16, 2 Corinthians 1: 20, Romans 8, 1 Peter 1:4-7 )  Continue to be bold, Mom + Dad. Keep speaking Scripture over your kids. Remember, more is caught than taught! Even when they roll their eyes or roll on the floor while you’re speaking Truth over them, keep sowing seeds of Truth. Your kids are watching, listening, and growing in the ways you are leading them.  ¹The Westminster Confession of Faith Oak Harbor, WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc., 1996

I’ll be the first to admit that when it comes to Christmas, my family can get swept up in the present-buying, consumer chaos, and mayhem of the holidays. If we aren’t careful, we miss the miracle of what we are truly celebrating. Chances are, you have felt that tension, too.  As parents, how do we help our kids keep Christ at the center of Christmas? How do we leverage everyday moments in December to anchor our hearts in the true meaning of Christmas this holiday season?  Here are a few practical tips on how to talk to your kids about Christmas.  Embrace the mystery.  Where exactly did the wise men travel from? How do angels speak? What does a heavenly host sound like? Why was Jesus born in a stable? How exactly did Mary become pregnant? There are a lot of details of Christ’s arrival that are difficult to grasp as a kid. And that’s okay.  The Bible isn’t a science book with every formula and detail outlined; it’s the perfect unfolding story of God’s redemptive plan for humanity–and it’s miraculous! Jesus, the son of God, fully man and fully God, was sent on mission to redeem and save. This was God’s plan from the beginning.  Kids will naturally have many questions, and it’s okay if you don’t know all the answers. Embrace the mystery of God’s divine and perfect plan and go on a learning journey together. Let the mystery of God and the truth of Christmas lead to awe, wonder, and worship.  Tell the whole Gospel story.  Often, we want to leave Jesus as a baby in the manger, but He is the risen King seated in heaven. Explain to your kids that Christ came as a baby, but He grew to give His life on the cross for our salvation. Help your kids see the whole Gospel story from the manger to the cross to the empty tomb:  Those baby hands grew to bear scars where nails held Him to the cross. His infant cries would become the Word of Life. His baby brow would one day wear a crown of thorns. His tiny feet and ten perfect toes would grow to carry Him on mission and past a stone-sealed tomb. The manger is empty, and so is the grave. Jesus came to die so that we might live.  We must remember and celebrate the entirety of the Gospel story at Christmas and every day.  Tell the story often.  Don’t save the story of Jesus for Christmas Eve. Instead, talk about the meaning of Christmas all month long and talk about it often. Repetition is often the best teacher for our children and us.  Read the nativity account together (Luke 2 is a great place to start) often throughout December around the table or listen to the bible app in the car. Encourage your kids to ask questions. Create space for them to imagine the scenes and retell the story back to you.  Visuals are also a great tool, so place a few kid-friendly nativity scenes around the house and encourage your kids to interact with them.  Reimagine your traditions.  Is Santa real? Why do we give presents? What’s all this singing about? Sometimes, we do things out of habit. So, as a family, discuss why you do what you do during the holiday and evaluate what helps you lean into Jesus and maintain a heart posture of gratitude and awe for what God has done.  Remember, Mom and Dad, you get to define your family culture. Maybe it’s time to set aside old traditions or create new ones. Here are some great tools and resources:  Read Waiting Here for You by Pastor Louie as a family. She Reads Truth Advent conversation cards. Use an advent wreath or calendar to remind you what the purpose of Christmas is: Jesus.Look for ways to serve together as a family during school breaks. Use what you have. Let everyday Christmas decor help teach scripture and the true meaning of the season. For example:  Christmas lights can remind us that Jesus is the light of the world.  I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life. John 8:12  Wreaths hung remind us of the crown of thorns that our savior would one day wear. As we share gifts, we remember Jesus is the greatest gift. In Him, we have been given everything we need. Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights.  James 1:17 For God so loved the world he gave his one and only son… John 3:16  Snow reminds us that through Jesus, our sins have been washed white as snow.  Soak me in your laundry and I’ll come out clean, scrub me and I’ll have a snow-white life.  Psalm 51:7 MSG Make it your mission to amplify the glory of Christ in Christmas this holiday. Make talking about Jesus and the things of God part of your family’s rhythm, not just during Christmas but every season. He is worthy of all our worship.