How to Thrive in Your Singleness

Today is day one of “How to Thrive in Your Singleness,” and we are focusing on the gift of singleness. Maybe that title alone is causing you to cringe or rethink clicking into this track. In a world constantly telling us that the next thing is the best thing, even a healthy desire for companionship or a family can take us into a mindset where any mention of intentional singleness can feel like an attack. It’s completely understandable.

So before we start, we’re going to need to make a choice to come into this track with an open mind, to say to God, “My hands are open, and my life is yours.” We know it may not be easy, but our prayer is that through these days together, our perspective on singleness could shift from seeing it as a time of waiting or even punishment to a time that your loving Heavenly Father has prepared for your good, and the furthering of the Kingdom of God.

Observe how Paul, an apostle of Christ known to have written 13 books of the New Testament, called singleness a gift from God. 

I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.

1 Corinthians 7:7

Take a moment to meditate on this verse in the context of what we just heard from Ben Stuart. How does this challenge your current thoughts on singleness?

“What we want is not always what’s best for us, and what’s best for us we don’t always desire or appreciate.”

Singleness may or may not be a gift you want. Maybe you’ve even had this thought before, “Why would God gift me with singleness if I desire to be married?” Remember that God is the fountain of love (1 John 4:19), and He works for the good of those who love him (Romans 8:28). When God gives us something, He is loving, wise, and good in doing so. So, when he gifts us singleness, even if we may not want it, it is out of His loving and wise nature.

Why? How? Well, the answers to those questions are as varied as each of us are but think back to the story Ben shared of the two gifts. What he initially thought of as the best gift brought him pain because he wasn’t ready to handle it well. Many of us have been in relationships that did the same. And the gift that Ben initially saw as boring or disappointing ended up being one of the greatest blessings in his life. Could it be possible that your singleness isn’t a case of withholding but is actually the loving wisdom of an almighty God who knows how it will bless you in time? 

Said another way, can you trust that God has gifted you with singleness for your good and His glory?